n YES... finally i'm letting go... i dun wish to hurt any1 further. it has alwaes been my one-sided persistence to hold on. but now, i've finally decided to let it go. guess i only saw reality now. u said it could nv happen, but i was foolish n refused to believe. thus, i decided to give it a try. BUT there were no results. i could not bring myself to face tis issue... i dun noe y, but i juz couldn't... it has been a while since u gave up on me... but only now, i accept it as a fact.

n tis is wad u call REALITY. hopes r all dashed, possibilities r all ruled out. n yea... it's my fault. i juz carn find the time to make miracles happen. i'm tired of putting so much effort into tis, when it doesn't even reap anyting. mayb, juz mayb, miracles WOULD happen if i carried on persisting... but i've lost hope. i've lost the will to carry on wif tis. evry step i take to get closer to u, u juz take a step away too, makin no difference at all. i'm exhausted wif tis 1 way ting...

ok... mayb i haf been selfish. n perhaps i failed to understand tt u had ur own life. but i've finally realized tt u wuld be so much beta n happier without me interfering. i noe wad i shud do now. n i m makin tt move now. but i can NEVER deny the fact tt u r still in my mind. until the day tt u've totally forgotten abt me, then will i start erasing u off my memory. but till then, u will alwaes stay deep in my mind...


m i really being selfish?
or r u juz not being receptive?

issit my mistakes?
or ur avoidance?

n if i'm gonna juz giv it a last try...
would u stay where u are n let me get closer?
or carry on wif the rejection?



shud i try? or shud i juz face reality?
as i slowly pluck the petals off the flower, i wonder wad the last petal would represent...

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NOW...
life is getting bad... real bad...

haf not been studying for so many recent tests...
not doin my hw, n got the teachers to let me hand in at a later date...
goin late for my cca...
dozing off in almost all lessons.
HAIX....

n so i haf decided to finish off those hw using tis weekend... but unfortunately, tml is a whole day filled wif scouts stuff...
n sunday... haix.. got a complimentary $40 ticket for the AHS concert @ esplanade frm mrs goh. n since my monday is already taken up by the PUB outing... i left only the precious sunday to do evryting.. but now the esplanade concert... haix... headache... ah wadeva...


i'm getting v attitude'd these few days.. coz i m so vexed easily frustrated... yup... juz dun feel good these days... =

tt's all for now... toodles.



i carn control it anymore. would u juz chain me up? thnx.